The beginning.

So…where to start? I’m a mum to a beautiful ten month old baby girl, I’m definitely NOT one of these perfect home-maker mums. I always thought I would be a Mary Poppins type of mum but it turns out I couldn’t be further away from that. I loose my temper a lot, I call her an asshole a lot, my house is a mess constantly but I’m at that stage in my parenting journey where I’m really not afraid to say it. I’m a bit of a shit mum, but that’s okay, we all are at times aren’t we?

My drama started from day one of being pregnant, my daughters biological father said he didn’t want a baby because he had another girlfriend that he didn’t want to leave, we haven’t spoke since I was about 12 weeks pregnant. I then thought it would be a good idea to get into a relationship with my lying, cheating ex boyfriend at around 6 months pregnant. We stayed together for the end of my pregnancy, the birth of my beautiful daughter, her first Christmas, my first mothers day and then 3 weeks before our first family holiday we spilt (he was a raging alcoholic but that’s a story for a different time). So now we live alone and I’ve come to terms with being a single mum. We are in a routine again, I’ve started taking night classes and even started seeing someone. Sounds like a super mum right? WRONG.

I find being a mum really hard, I’m battling with depression every day. Anxiety attacks stop me from leaving the house unless I’m with someone and I’m constantly battling with my own mind and insecurities daily. Despite every single day being a battle, I love my Daughter. She really is amazing. I could just squeeze her little face!

So what I’m trying to tell you is, this blog is going to be me having a rant when I’ve had a bad day. Whinging about being a Mum and trying to date etc…Feel free to come on this ride with us because I’m sure it will make you feel a lot better about being a mum, a girlfriend and overall a person.

 

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